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when a friend is bad

Body, Mood Boosters

EZ solutions for a toxic friendship

September 2, 2011
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We’ve all got those friends who you love being with … most of the time. However, every once in awhile their narcissistic, flakey, or critical behavior starts to affect how you feel about yourself.  Not good!

The Friendship Doctor, aka Irene Levine, psychiatrist and author of “Best Friends Forever: Surviving A Break-Up With Your Best Friend” and creator of The Friendship Blog. wrote a recent post on the very topic of toxic friendships – and provides some simple solutions.

And don’t worry – you’re not alone. In a survey conducted by The Today Show and Self Magazine, 84 percent of women and 75 percent of men admitted to having a toxic friendship.

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Need help dealing with a toxic pal? Try these tips from Irene Levine:

  • Self-absorbed sidekicks: Change the conversation from him/her to you (which won’t be easy). Change the subject and/or explicitly tell your narcissistic friend that you need and deserve their attention.
  • Chronic downers:  Set firm boundaries and tell him/her your limits (and enforce them!). Also encourage them to befriend other people — as in, spread the misery over more friends.
  • Overly critical chums: Have confidence in your own values and opinions. Also realize you may need to agree to disagree or else your relationship will be filled with contention.
  • Underminers: Recognize that this person is probably a “frenemy” and exercise caution, i.e., watch your back. Also, if the undermining is excessive and leaves you feeling badly about yourself, you may need to back away from the friendship.
  • Unreliable flakes: You may need to remind them of their commitments. Also remember, if someone is consistently unreliable, why would you ever rely on them?

To read the entire article, CLICK here:

Have a great labor day weekend ladies!